You'll check out the products on their website. They seem of good quality. The "brochure site" is nicely designed. Maybe you saw them on Shark Tank? They seem more or less like other ecommerce sites you've been on. Looks pretty promising, especially for a somewhat cheeky gift.

As you're browsing, you'll get an offer for "Expedited Shipping" with a 10 minute counter. You'll pick something, step through the checkout process on their website, trying to figure out what exactly 'expedited shipping' means, and when you could expect arrival. You figure there will certainly be a page showing you the delivery options and estimated shipment dates, before they actually charge you - right? So you go ahead and click on 'proceed'.

Nope. You get redirected to a "Thanks For Your Purchase!" screen. But, oddly, not even this screen shows anything about when or how the product would be delivered. Then, you'll get an email receipt... which also contains absolutely no information about how or when the item is being shipped.

Baffled, you'll reach out to their "priority support" lines, who will refuse to tell you when the product you just ordered will arrive, or ship [see the image of their extremely helpful response to me, below, for reference]. You'll email them more questions, and be completely ignored. You'll decide to call them out on social media, at which point you'll find that they become *very* communicative!

Sadly, the social media rep will tell blatant lies (like "check your order status on the account page" -- which does not contain the order status) and move the conversation to a private DM, at which point they will simply refuse to help you, and then stop responding.

Confused and concerned about the ethics of this shady company, you'll go to the Account settings page to strip your personal info out, at which point you'll discover that you can't. Nope, you have to make up dummy placeholder info to overwrite it -- which also means that if you only have one credit card, there's no way to get your card out of their system.

You'll tab over to your email to send them another message they certainly won't respond to, to kindly ask them to please take their hands off your credit card. You'll discover that they've already thoughtfully sent you a promotional email -- even though you unchecked the "it's okay to contact me for promotional purposes" checkbox somewhere deep within their multipage checkout form.

Then... you'll decide to do everything in your power to make sure everyone knows what a scam this company is, and you'll find this website, and read this. I'm sorry you've arrived, but I feel you. Yeah, they suck.

PS: Make sure you go through all ~fifteen "are you SURE you want to cancel this?" popups to fully cancel the auto-renewing subscription service that will be attached to your account without your consent!